June 13, 2012
11:27pm So.....we were finally ready to walk out the door, Seth had his arms full of pillows, bag, who knows what else, and I had....a baby in my belly wanting to come out, my arms were completely empty :) Our back door is set up where you have to go out 2 doors very close together. Seth was about to open the final door to go out and I was in the frame of the first door when I stopped bent over and somewhat moaned, "Wait!" Two things happened at this point. The first being that I was racking my brain to think of a "good reason" to NOT get in the car. I just couldn't do it. I consciously didn't even know why at that point; I just knew I needed to find a reason to stay. My brain found the reason of having to go to the bathroom, which was somewhat true. Any woman that has given birth before knows what I'm talking about, you feel like you have to go to the bathroom almost the whole time you're in labor and honestly you usually do have to go to the bathroom!
11:28 pm - "Wait!" then quickly adding, "I ummm need to go to the bathroom"
I watched all breath leave my husband as he slumped his shoulders and dropped everything (this is the other thing that happened. My husband lost all hope of making it to the hospital) A moment in our marriage that I will never forget. It was as if he was so close to....to what I'm not sure but it seemed that if he just could have gotten me out the door he could have gotten us to help, to the hospital. His hand was right there, it was on the door knob. He was so close! Instead of turning the door knob and going out, and getting that help he so desperately wanted, help he thought he needed, instead he slowly took his hand off the door knob, turned to me.
"Are we doing this here?" He asked but he didn't even wait for a responses from me, as he half heartily answered his own question, "We're doing this here. Aren't we?!"
11:30pm - I honestly responded, "I don't know, I.....just need to go to the bathroom, I don't know, just....just follow me."
Which he did.
11:31pm - Seth gave me a second in the bathroom then timidly, afraid of what he would see in my eyes, on my face, afraid to see that look of "this baby is coming any minute."He peeked in the bathroom; he slowly entered, took one look at me and declared, more to prepare himself then tell me, "We're doing this here."
Without looking up at him, I nodded.
He sheepishly asked, "how much time do we have?"
Huffing between contractions I answered and came up with a game plan, "Not much. I'm getting in the tub. Go tell the babysitter we're doing this here, then get a phone and call 911."
Seth leaves to get a phone and tell babysitter.
11:31pm - Seth announces to the sitter and Jericho, whom was now wide awake, "The baby is coming!"
"Yeaahhhh....that's why I'm here." the confused babysitter says to Seth, wondering why he would need to tell her the baby was coming when she already knew that the baby was coming.
"No, the baby is coming HERE! NOW!" He franticly and clearly explains.
"Oh....OH!!!" she finally understands. Then calmly (because she is awesome like that and God totally knew we needed her as a babysitter that night) she asks, "What do you need me to do?"
"Call 911." Seth is thankful for the help, hands her the phone, then comes to check on me.
11:31pm - "How are you?" My worried husband asks.
"It's time." is all I could get out.
"What do I do? Will the 911 people walk me through it? I need my phone. I have to go get it. I'll be right back." His eyes are the size of saucers as he leaves to go get his phone from the sitter.
11:31pm - Please come back quickly! I think, but let him go without saying anything, I'm focused on breathing through these awful, yet wonderful, but only I know the end is near and it will result in a beautiful baby in my arms, contractions, knowing that I can wait to push, but only for a moment.
11:30pm - He's back within seconds. He's giving the 911 guy our address (for the millionth time, this guy was seriously awful!!!)
Thank God he's back and help is on the way! I think to myself and am relieved until I feel the surge of the arduous contraction with every ounce of my being.
11:32 - I want to cry. I want to scream, but all I can manage is an almost too quiet "It's time babe, it's time...." this gets his full attention. I hear Seth mumble something to the 911 guy about the baby coming now and puts his phone down to focus on me. I am thankful he is here with me.
11:33 - I prop myself up some using the edge of the tub and in two fleeting, strenuous pushes the baby emerged into this world, into our hearts, into our home, into Seth's arms! Seth scoops the baby up pats the baby on the back a few times to get a weak cry and puts the baby in my arms.
11:33 - We look at each other for a moment, eyes locked, tears threatening, mouths wide open, but no words would come. Time freezes. Did we really just do this? Together bring our child into this world, just the two of us?
Truly one of the coolest moments of our marriage!
11:34pm - All at once if felt like it went from time standing still to warp speed. Seth picks his phone back up to find that the 911 guy hung up! I told you he was awful!
We didn't know if we were having a boy or a girl. I was pretty sure I saw boy parts as the baby was coming out and getting scooped up by daddy but not sure enough to proclaim we had a son. And in those moments where time stood still it didn't matter if we had a son or daughter, all that mattered is that we did it! Togther! Once felt like they went into warp speed I realized the baby was snuggled next to me but was wet, naked, and most likely cold, I know I was! So, even before we knew if we had a son or daughter I sent Seth to the car to get the "car kit" we had prepared so I could wipe off and wrap the baby in some sterile towels.
11:34 - Off Seth goes. Once Seth left I remember checking to confirm that I did, in fact, see boy parts, like I thought I saw when Seth was delivering him. Yup, they were there! We had another son! I called for Seth to tell him, but he didn't come. What's funny is that when I realized he wasn't coming I thought: He left me, he just delivered our baby at home and then left me. He didn't say a word, he just left. What is more important then me and this baby right now? Within seconds of thinking this Seth walked in with the "car kit" I giggled to myself and felt silly at my own thoughts remembering now why Seth had left :) What was even funnier to me is that as soon as Seth walked in with the "car kit" he with a sheepish grin on his face asked, "Is it a boy or a girl? I totally forgot to look!" I was thrilled to tell him he had another son! He smiled kissed me and with tears in his eyes he went to tell Jericho that she had the brother she'd been praying for. I wipe the babe off, got a clean town to wrap around him and I started crying as I snuggled him and it finally him me that I had a SON at HOME! I had waited six and a half years to say that. God is so faithful!
11:34 - Jericho stuck her head in and as she leaned against the door post she quietly asked, "Mommy? Do I really have a brother?" like it was too good to be true. With a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes I gave her a whispered shaky, "Yes Lovey, you do." At that point we smiled at each other through our tears and she went back to tell our babysitter she did, in fact, have a brother at home!
11:35: Two Sheriffs arrive. I wasn't even aware there were in my home, let alone the fist ones that arrived. Seth later told me that one of them came over to him and said, "Sir, the peremeter is secure." We still laugh at this!
11:37: Three volunteer first responders arrive. For the 2nd time that night I found myself talking to a 12 yr old, at least that's about how old he looked! Thankfully he was very good at what he does. He was very caring, calm, & professional. But as I was sitting there talking to this baby face, very thankful I still had my bra on, only minutes ago giving birth, I still couldn't help but wonder what his thoughts of this whole situation were.
11:40: Four volunteer ambulance crew members arrive and go into bathroom to help me and to relieve the first responders. The afterbirth was still in me so they decided to cut the cord there instead of waiting till we got to the hospital. As they were fumbling with cutting the cord, yes they fumbled and I was starting to get a little nervous, I almost asked if Seth could cut the cord, then I smiled to myself as I thought: oh wait, he delivered the baby, who cares about cutting the cord when you delivered the baby! So I let them continue to fumble with the cord and figure it out while I kept my mouth shut and treasured my thoughts: my husband, delivered our son, at home, in the bathtub and it wasn't planned! and for the first time it registered in my mind and my heart.
11:41 - Two paramedic arrived, thank God these guys were NOT volonteer. These guys were wonderful!
11:42 - Midwife calls leaves message on my phone wondering where we are. Ha! This still makes me laugh :)
11:42 - The 4th and final EMT arrived.
11:43 - Ambulance crew taking care of of me and wrapped up the baby.
11:45 - Seth takes the baby to Jericho so she can see him again.
11:46 - Paramedic checks the baby for number of fingers and toes, he gives Jericho the report that all are in place and accounted for :)
11:49 - They got me out of the tub, onto a stretcher and wheeled and loaded me into the Ambulance, For the 2nd time in my life I find myself in an ambulance thanks to my 2nd son. The first time it was my first son :) my boys, I tell ya. Seth carried the baby out and then gave him to me as he kissed me and said he'd meet us at the hospital. I couldn't wait for Seth to just be with me again. Since the first responders arrived I hadn't seen much of him, my strength was waning and I needed the his strength and protection to lean heavy on. I needed him close. A 30 minute ambulance ride felt like torture at that point. If it weren't for the afterbirth still being in me, I think I would have asked if they'd let Seth drive me to the hospital. Thankfully the real paramedic was awesome and it was very easy to make small talk. He even gave Ephraim his first stuffed animal, a doggy. He said that he'd been the first one to give all his nieces their first stuffed animal and he wanted to extend the tradition to our baby! I also found out that he was getting married in few months and hoped to have a house full of his own kids some day.Everyone, but the babysitter and Jericho, leaves.
11:50pm - House is silent.
I'm not going to go into much detail. Once we arrived they worked to the afterbirth out, which didn't take much. They started checking the baby. He was having some problems keeping his body temp up and a few other things so it was a little nerve wrecking for a little while. They had to keep checking his blood ever time I nursed him and if numbers weren't going up it could have gotten serious but thankfully his numbers went right up and he was fine! It wasn't until around 3 am that Seth and I got a chance to talk about a name for sure. We were almost positive about his first name but were very unsure about a middle name. I love that unbeknownst to the other one, neither of us had told anyone the babes name, even though everyone was asking. I ask if Seth thought Ephraim was still right for a first name and agreed as did I but we both were still very hesitant about the middle name we thought we had decided on. Thats when I looked deep in his eyes and said, "Babe....what about Ephraim Seth, after the man that delivered him?" He sat back and whispered, I need a minute to think about it, a minute later with tears in his eyes he said, "Ephraim Seth Goodson, yes, that's his name!" It was perfect. We weren't planning to name this baby after his daddy, but God and this baby were, when they decided to have daddy do the honors of delivering :)
Ephraim's first picture, 3+ hours old, at the hospital
So, on June 13, 2012 at 11:33pm Ephraim Seth Goodson was born, it was an unplanned, unassisted, home birth where daddy delivered the baby! Ephraim Seth weighed 7 lbs 5 oz and was 19 3/4 inches long.
Ephraim Seth & his daddy
- I remember hearing Ephraim's first whimpers and then promptly hearing Jericho tell our babysitter that the baby had, "the sweetest cry ever."
- I remember at some point I didn't feel like Ephraim wasn't breathing. He didn't give a huge cry when he first came out and then snuggled into me so quickly that I was nervous he wasn't breathing, so I unwrapped him to check his color and get him to cry. He sure did not like that and let me know! Which is exactly what I wanted. I wrapped him back up and snuggled him happy knowing that he had good color and was, in fact, breathing.
My Sweet Boy
- How amazing my husband was, I'll never forget it, he was awesome!
- Our baby sitter was seriously awesome, she's like a grandma to the girls already and having her there was such a relief because I knew Jericho was in great hands! You may be wondering how I know this time line well it's because of our babysitter. She is
a little OCDan editor and loves details and knew that we'd want the details of this night. So, the day after Ephraim was born she wrote everything down she remembered; she looked back at what time texts were sent or phone calls were made and so on. Between her information and what we had and remembered this is a very accurate account of what happened :)
Haven's been loving on Ephraim since she met him!
- We never heard a peep out of Haven; she slept through the whole thing and our bathroom is right next to the girls room.
- The day Ephraim turned 3 months we went for a walk. I was walking with E in the moby and the girls were ridding their bikes. All of a sudden this big red truck pulled over and the man in the truck asked if I lived on (our street name.) My first thought was oh no our house is on fire or something crazy like that. I hesitantly told him yes and then he asked if the baby was born at home and before I could answer he said he was a volunteer EMT. It all started coming together. He said he'd been wanting to stop and see how the baby was doing and what we named him :) I told him I'd been wanting to take the baby to the ambulance station and take cookies to thank everyone. He told me since it's a volunteer station that no one is ever there and unless I had connections it was pretty much impossible. So I asked him to thank everyone for me and was thankful for the interaction.
A Few Things I wish I Would Have Done:
- Taken pictures! We don't have a single picture of Ephraim until we were at the hospital and he was 3hrs old. Not a single one. Not of me with him in the tub, not one of Seth holding him, not of Jericho holding him, not of me on the stretcher, or in the ambulance. Nodda, zero, zilch. I'm very sad about this and pray my memories suffice and stay clearly etched in my mind.
- I wish I would have put water in the tub....there really wasn't time before I had him but even after would have been nice...well maybe not too clean but anyway, I guess a blanket would have been nice I was freezing and.....well.....just out there for everyone that walked in my house, there were about 12 strangers, to see.
Jericho and mommy talking about what happened the night before :)
- I wish I would have taken a second to talk to Jericho and ask how she was doing, if she had questions, and to say goodbye (a good goodbye not just the quick bye that we got.) Thankfully we had an awesome babysitter that talked her through everything and let Jericho call me, around 2am (she didn't fall asleep till 2:45ish) when she was still wired hours later and was wondering if mommy "got cleaned up." That sweet girl, I'm did get a chance to talk to her once we were home and settled, to hear her side of the story and answer some questions she had. For the first 3 months of Ephriam's life she'd ask if it was worth it and if I'd do it again or mention how glad she was awake and that it happened that way it did! I pray she remembers it even as she gets older.
- I wish I would have had Seth come back in the bathroom with me once everyone (all 12 of them) arrived. Our bathroom is small and there were already 2 other people in there so there wasn't room but I know I would have been able to verbalize what I needed/wanted (a blanket, warmth, just having him close) much better if I'd had his protection and safety.
Kids with their "Sherif's Badge" that the awesome paramedic gave them!
Honestly I don't know that I'd change a thing if I had the chance, except maybe getting pictures, it was an amazing experience and I'd do it again in a heartbeat....not sure Seth would say the same but...maybe if it was a PLANNED home birth :) Jericho is always asking me, "Was it worth it mom? Having Ephraim at home." It was so worth sweet girl, having your daddy deliver your brother at home, it was so worth it!